Living In Her Shaddow
by RoxxiSanders
Summary: Rose comes back and Martha starts to feel left out when he pays more attention to Rose than her. She knew she’d never be Rose, he knew she’d never be Rose; they both knew she’d never be Rose...then why did he call her that? Ten/Martha Ten/Rose friendship.


**DISCLAIMER: **I own nothing. Sadly David Tennant and the Doctor do not belong to me…no matter how much I wish they did. I don't own any of the other characters either, they are property of BBC so don't sue pretty please and thank you. I also do not own the song 'I Miss You'; all right belong to Hanna Montana and whoever else was involved with the song. Nor do I own 'The Reason', it is by Hoobastank.

**SUMMARY:** Rose comes back and Martha starts to feel left out when he pays more attention to his former companion than he does to her. She knew she'd never be Rose, he knew she'd never be Rose; they both knew she'd never be Rose...then why did he call her that?

**A/N** Sorry for those of you that love Rose but I just don't think she was suited to the Tenth Doctor. I liked her and was kinda sad to see her go but I love Martha, she's fab so please don't hate me for writing Ten/Martha and if you do then feel free not to tell me.

**Living in her Shadow**

"Doctor, where are you?" Martha walked the halls of the TARDIS calling out for him in a 'sing-songy' voice. "Come out, come out wherever you are." She was startled when she reached the Doctor's bedroom and heard him talking to someone, a female someone. "Doctor?" She knocked on the door, curious as to whom he had let into the TARDIS.

"Oh I have missed you. I can't believe you found a way around it, I thought all the seals had been closed; thought I'd never see you again." Martha stood in the hall, outside the door, as the Doctor hugged Rose tightly to him inside his bedroom.

"I know, I've missed you too, so much." She hugged him back, making up for all the hugs they had missed out on.

Martha stood on the other side of the door, shocked at what she was hearing. She turned round and was about to walk back down the hall when the door opened and she was greeted with a very smiley Doctor. "Martha?"

At the mention of her name she turned round, "Oh hey, I was just umm…you know…going back to my room." He smirked at her and she smiled up at him.

"Did you want me?" He looked at her questioningly and she shook her head.

'If only you knew how much.' She willed the voice in her head to shut up as she shook her head again before answering him, "No I was just…doesn't matter." He raised an eyebrow at her. "Sorry to have bothered you."

"S'ok, are you sure you're alright?" She nodded and he nodded. "Ok, well see you in a bit then I guess."

"Yeah see you later." He walked back into his room and she turned and headed back to her own room. She walked through the door and flopped down on the bed, wishing she knew who the stranger in the Doctor's room was.

An hour later she was still lying on her back staring at the ceiling when the Doctor knocked. "Yeah?"

"Can I come in?" He sounded excited and she wondered if he had found a new planet to discover.

"Sure, door's unlocked." He walked in and walked over to the bed, sitting down and making himself comfy. "Hey, 'sup?"

"I have a friend that I want you to meet." He smiled down at her and she sat up, suddenly interested in who his mystery guest was.

"Really? Who?" She wanted to meet the newcomer, just to put her mind at rest."

"Rose. She's come back; she found a loophole; isn't it great." Martha's heart sank but she put a fake smile on her face for the Doctor's sake.

"Really? Wow, that's…that's great. I'll be out in a minute, 'kay?"

"Okay, don't be long." He stood up and left the room, leaving her lying terrified that she was going to lose her best friend. She stood up and walked down the hall and into the control room, only to be greeted by a sight which confirmed her fears. The Doctor stood looking at a screen, Rose stood with her chin resting on his shoulder. He turned round when she entered as did Rose. "Ah Martha, I'd like you to meet a very special friend of mine. Martha this is Rose Tyler, Rose this is Martha Jones, my newest recruit.

Rose smiled up at him then turned to Martha, "Nice to meet you." She walked over to Martha and held her hand out.

Martha took it and shook her hand. "Nice to meet you too, the Doctor's told me a lot about you."

"All good I hope." She looked back at the Doctor who had an innocent smile plastered on his face then back at Martha.

"Don't worry; he spoke very highly of you." Rose smiled and Martha decided that Rose seemed like a nice enough girl so she'd give her the benefit of the doubt.

"Well I am going for a shower, I'll leave you two to get to know each other" He smiled at them both and then headed off towards the bathroom.

As soon as she was sure that he was out of earshot, Rose glared at Martha. "He's mine, you got that?" Martha looked at her defiantly but Rose wasn't budging. "I love him and he loves me, you were nothing more than a fill in but now I'm back so you can leave if you want to."

"What if I don't want to?" She glared back, here eyes full of determination.

"Listen Mary…"

"Martha." Martha interrupted, the least Rose could do was get her name right.

"Whatever, thanks for keeping an eye on the Doctor for me but he doesn't need you anymore because I'm here to take care of him. So first thing in the morning I want you to tell him you wanna go home."

"Why should I?" Martha wasn't going to give up, the Doctor meant way too much to her and if she had to fight Rose then she would.

"Because if you don't, I swear I will make your life a living hell." If looks could kill then the glare that Rose had just given Martha would have finished her off in an instant.

"No." Martha was standing her ground; no way in hell was she giving him up.

Realising that her plan wasn't working, Rose started playing dirty, emotionally blackmailing Martha. "Did you ever think about the Doctor? It'll be so crowded in here and he'll love me but won't wanna hurt you. He'll be miserable because he'll be torn between loving me and not wanting to hurt you. It's hardly fair and if you care about him then you'll leave."

Martha dropped her gaze to the floor, quietly mumbling. "But he means so much to me, I can't leave him."

"If you care about him then you have to."

Martha remained silent and Rose smirked, knowing that she had won and that soon the Doctor would be hers.

Half an hour later the doctor walked into the TARDIS living room to see Rose sat on a sofa and Martha sat cross-legged on the floor surrounded by papers. She looked up and saw him in the doorway then stood up and ran over to him, throwing herself into his arms. He looked down at her confused but wrapped his arms around her waist, lifting her up and holding her tightly to him as she started to sob. "Martha? Martha, what's wrong?" The concern was evident in his voice, making her feel even more upset.

"I'm so sorry Doctor. I never meant to hurt you." She sobbed into his chest as he put her down and wrapped his arms around her shoulders.

"What? You haven't." She sobbed harder and his heart tore in two. "Martha, where is all this coming from? You haven't hurt me; you have nothing to be sorry for."

"No you don't understand Doctor I…" She trailed off, crying and trembling in his arms.

The Doctor continued to rub circles on her back as he rested his chin on top of her head and looked over to Rose, mouthing to her, 'What's wrong with her?' Rose remained silent but shrug her shoulders, pretending that she knew nothing. "Martha? Please stop crying. Whatever you think you've done to let me down I can promise you that you haven't. I'm fine so stop crying; come on, smile?" She looked up at him and shook her head. He pouted at her and she couldn't help the small laugh that escaped her lips. He smiled at her then leant down and kissed her forehead, "No more crying ok?"

"No more crying. I'm sorry, I don't know where this all came from." She smiled up at him as she told him that she'd be fine. "Thanks for…you know."

He told her it was alright and then let go of her waist and crossed the living room to sit on the sofa next to Rose. "What's with all the papers anyway?"

Martha resumed her place on the floor as she explained why his living room was scattered with papers. "I can't pass my med finals if I don't revise for them." He agreed then settled back into the sofa to watch some TV.

Martha was the first one up the next morning. She climbed out of bed and walked into the kitchen, putting the kettle on and placing two cups on the counter. She put a tea bag in one of the cups then put a spoonful of coffee into hers and added one sugar and some milk to hers and the doctor's usual milk and four sugars. She knew she couldn't leave him, just walk out of his life but she also knew that she couldn't sit by and be pushed aside for Rose.

"Morning Miss Jones." She was torn from her thoughts, and indeed any rational thoughts, as the Doctor whispered in her ear.

She turned around and looked at him, pasting a smile on her face and grinning at him. "Good morning."

"I take it Rose isn't up yet?" He raised an eyebrow at her and her smile faded.

"No but I umm…can I explain about last night?"

"You don't need to, it's ok and we've sorted it." He grinned manically at her, hiding the concern behind his eyes and not wanting to get into such a discussion this early in the morning.

"Please? It's really important and…and I need to talk to you about Rose."

He sighed but gave in and nodded. "Ok then, I'm listening."

She took a deep breath before continuing, knowing that what she was about to say could have a lot of consequences and fully aware that he probably wouldn't believe her. "Rose doesn't like me, in fact she hates me."

"I'm sure she doesn't, you just need to get to know her." He refused to believe that his best friend hated his new companion; he refused to believe that his innocent Rose hated anyone.

"She does, she…she told me to tell you that I wanted to leave, that I wanted to go home." She looked at the floor the entire time, scared of looking up for fear that she would see disbelief and anger.

"No, I know Rose and she isn't like that. She wouldn't tell you to leave." Her fears were confirmed, he didn't believe her.

She looked up at him, anger radiating from her eyes. "Are you saying I'm lying to you?"

He closed his eyes, unable to look at the hurt in her eyes. "No, I'm just saying that maybe you misinterpreted what she was saying."

He looked at her and she looked down at the floor then back up at him. "Why won't you believe me?"

He sighed and rubbed his eyes tiredly. He'd just gotten up but he wanted to go back to bed already. "I never said I don't believe you."

She stared at him stubbornly. "So you agree that Rose did tell me to leave?" A flash of hope entered her eyes.

"Well no, I wasn't there so I can't side with either of you."

The hurt and anger replaced the hope as she raised her voice, "But you are! You're siding with her!"

"Stop being so childish." His voice remained unnaturally calm as he looked at her, his face unreadable.

"I'm not but it's clear you don't believe me! I'll never mean as much to you as her, I know that but I am so goddamn sick of being treated like I'm nothing! Being treated like someone that's there to look after you when she isn't!" She knew that part of her was being childish and a little bit jealous but part of her also knew that she was right. "You're always comparing me to Rose; can't you accept me for who I am?"

"When?" She looked at him, confused. "When have I ever compared you to Rose?" He knew that what he had just asked was a stupid question, he was always comparing her to Rose and he knew it.

"When we went meeting Shakespeare. I tried so hard to get you to open up, to cheer you up but all you did was tell me that Rose would know what to do, what to say; do you know how worthless that made me feel?" Her voice was so soft he had to struggle to hear her and it amazed him how she could go from loud to quiet in the blink of an eye.

"I…I didn't…" He looked at her helplessly, knowing that she was right but trying to pretend that she wasn't; trying to pretend that he hadn't been that cold towards her.

"Forget it. I can't take this anymore; I can't sit by while you pretend that life's perfect, that everything's fine. It isn't fine and I can't listen to you compare me to her all the time; it ain't fair." She looked down at the floor, hiding her emotions from him.

"Why are you being like this Rose?" He immediately realised what he had done and looked at her in horror as she looked up at him, tears spilling over her eyes. "I…Martha I didn't…"

"Forget it Doctor, you've made everything clear." She angrily swiped at the tears in her eyes, willing them to stop but no matter how hard she tried, they fell down her cheeks."

"No…I didn't mean it. I swear I didn't mean it." He whispered, hating himself for what he had reduced her to.

She said nothing, just turned around and walked down the hall and into her bedroom, falling on the bed and sobbing into a pillow.

It was a week after she'd left that the Doctor finally realised that she wasn't going to come running back to him this time; he'd had his last chance and he'd blown it. He sat out on the balcony and stared at the stars. Martha had been amazed when she'd discovered that the TARDIS had a balcony and he had smiled and held her hand as the pointed out constellations. Now he was sat there, on his own, thinking back and wishing he had done more to get Martha to stay. Silent tears fell down his face but he made no effort to wipe them away, memories were all he had left of Martha Jones.

Martha was sat cross legged on her bed, hugging her teddy bear to her chest and wishing she was back in the TARDIS. She knew that she couldn't go back though; he'd had his chance and blown it. She also knew that she couldn't compete with Rose and that if she went back, nothing would change. For the past week she had cried herself to sleep, wishing that he had done more to get her to stay. She leaned over and switched on the radio, determined to forget about him but to no avail; the song which came on only made her think about him more.

_**I miss you**_

_**I miss your smile**_

_**And I still shed a tear every once in any while**_

_**And even though it's different now**_

_**You're still here somehow**_

_**My heart won't let you go**_

_**And I need you to know**_

_**I miss you**_

_**Sha-la-la-la-la**_

_**I miss you **_

She listened to the words of the song as silent tears fell down her cheeks and memories of the time she had spent with him flooded her head. Once again she cried herself to sleep that night.

Rose walked out onto the balcony two months later and placed a cup of tea on the small table. "Are you ok?" It was a lame question but she didn't know what to say to him. He had been stood on this balcony every night ever since Martha had walked out. She wondered if he was wishing on every star he saw, clinging on to the hope that she'd be back.

"No…no I'm not." He quietly whispered to her and she was shocked as he made absolutely no effort to hide his pain.

"I…umm…Doctor what's wrong?" He finally turned to face her and shook his head. "Please, just trust me."

"I let her go…just let her walk out of my life and I've regretted it ever since." She could hear the raw emotion in his voice and it scared her, he always hid his feelings behind a manic grin and now he wasn't. When she thought about it, she realised that he hadn't smiled in two months, not a sincere one anyway; he'd faked them for her sake but she'd seen through it. Now it was like he couldn't be bothered and she realised that it was her fault as much as his. He'd let Martha walk out but she had been the one that had told Martha to leave. She'd been jealous, put her own happiness in front of the Doctor's, the one person that she cared about most. Because of her two lives had been destroyed, two people plummeted into emotional turmoil. She was about to answer him when he turned round and started to walk back inside. She followed him and he walked down the corridor, entering his room and switching on the radio, trying to erase any memory of Martha Jones.

_**I've found a reason for me, **_

_**To change who I used to be **_

_**A reason to start over new, **_

_**And the reason is you **_

_**I've found a reason to show, **_

_**A side of me you didn't know **_

_**A reason for all that I do, **_

_**And the reason is you**_

The words only made things worse because Martha had given him all of those things. When Rose had gone he'd thought nothing was worth fighting for and then he had met Martha. She was bright, funny, sweet and possibly the best thing that had ever happened to him. He had also cried himself to sleep that night.

Rose stood outside his door, tears falling over her cheeks. She knew what she had to do even though it would ruin any chance she had of being with the Doctor as anything more than a friend. Stood on the balcony, listening to him pour his heart out in violent sobs and regrets, she had realised that once, a long time ago, he had loved her but now he loved Martha. He still loved her but Martha was everything to him and she knew that if she ever wanted to save their friendship, she would have to reunite him with the person that made him happy…she needed to find Martha.

Taking over the TARDIS had been easy, once she was sure the Doctor had been asleep she had crept into the control room and set the coordinates. He had even stirred when it took off, she had actually been very worried and had crept back into his room to check he was still alive at one point. When it finally landed, behind a tree outside of Martha's apartment, she walked out and locked the door behind her. She hurried up to the front door and knocked, waiting for someone to answer. A boy answered the door, he looked a little younger than Martha but he was dressed in a pair of pyjama pants and a t-shirt. It appeared that Martha had moved on and Rose stared at the man in front of her. He had the same skin tone as Martha and a pair of inquisitive eyes, she could see why Martha would have fallen for him; he was quite a catch.

"Can I help you?" He broke her out of her thoughts and she looked up, embarrassed at being caught checking him out.

"Umm, can I speak to Martha? I know it's late but it's really important." She looked at him with pleading eyes, he could see that whatever it was wouldn't wait until morning so he let her in and ushered her to the living room, telling her that he would go and wake her up.

He knocked on the door and walked in, walking over to the bed and gently shaking her awake. "Martha? Martha wake up, someone here to see you."

Martha opened her eyes and sat up slowly. "Who the hell would want to talk to me at this hour?" She was silently hoping that it was the Doctor but the man shrugged his shoulders and she reluctantly got out of bed. She walked into the living room and was disappointed to see Rose stood in the middle of the room, looking round at pictures of her and her family. One picture in particular stood out, a picture of her and the Doctor, he was sat on a chair and she was sat on his lap with her arms wrapped loosely around his neck.

"Martha before you say anything…"

"Get out, I have nothing to say to you." Martha's voice was cold and Rose was about to retaliate when she realised that Martha had every right to be annoyed at her. After all she had caused her to leave the TARDIS and the Doctor behind but she was here to sort things out.

"No but I have things to say to you so sit down and hear me out because I am not leaving until you listen." Martha stood in shock, mouth open, staring at her in disbelief. Rose raised an eyebrow and Martha obediently sat down in a chair and looked at her in anticipation. "I know I told you to leave and believe me I was overjoyed when you did."

"Are you going somewhere with this?" Martha interrupted and Rose glared at her.

"Yeah I am so shut up. I was glad that you'd gone but the Doctor wasn't, he has been crying himself to sleep every night since you left."

Martha looked at her, eyebrows raised in disbelief. "He never cries, he has no emotions…well he does but he never shows them."

"He cried when I left…not that I had much choice."

Martha gave a cold laugh and looked at her incredulously. "Is that supposed to make me feel better?"

"Look I came here to sort things out not to argue with you. He's missing you, more that you could ever realise. He isn't the same, he doesn't smile anymore and on the rare occasion that he does you can tell it's fake. He needs you Martha and I think deep down you need him too." Martha shook her head but remained silent. "Look me in the eye and tell me you don't miss him."

Martha shook her head again. "I can't because I do miss him, I miss him so much it hurts but he has you. I can't keep playing second best; there is no way I can't compete with you Rose." Her voice was quiet but Rose could hear the hurt in her voice. "I'm trying to move on; I suggest that he does the same."

Rose looked at the man who was now sitting on the sofa then back at Martha. "Didn't take you long to move on, did it?" Her voice was cold and accusatory, here eyes were the same and Martha could have sworn she saw flashes of anger mixed in there too.

Martha opened her mouth in shock but quickly retorted, anger evident in her voice. "What? How dare you! You tell me to leave so I do and when I try to move on you tell me that I'm in the wrong! Well I'm sorry but I can't pine over a man that doesn't care about me forever!"

"So you just jump into bed with another man then huh?"

"For God's sake, I have to move on but for what it's worth, this is Leo, my brother!" Leo sat looking uncomfortably at the two women arguing and then stared back down at the floor.

"What?" Rose's voice lowered, embarrassment taking over.

"Leo's my brother. I've tried to move on but every guy that comes near…I've compared to the Doctor."

"I knew you missed him, I could tell. Come back with me? Give him another chance, something tells me this time he won't mess it up."

"I can't because I know I'll be let down again and it isn't fair putting us both through that. Why are you here? Did he put you up to this?"

"No he doesn't know I'm here, I sneaked out."

"I can't Rose, I'm sorry. Thanks for trying but he'll get over me, give it a few weeks and he'll be fine…you'll be his everything again."

"I don't want to be his everything when he's like this. The Doctor I knew died the second you walked out." Martha looked into Rose's eyes knew that she was telling the truth but she couldn't risk having her heart broken again; she was still trying to piece it together after the last time he had broken it.

"I'm sorry Rose; I just can't, not again."

Dejectedly she entered the TARDIS and went into her bedroom, her plan had failed; Martha wasn't coming back. In her heart she hadn't expected Martha to listen to her, had known that she was hurting and just trying to move on.

The next morning she walked into the kitchen to find him stirring a cup of tea. "Morning." She whispered, not wanting to scare him.

"Hey, what are we doing here?" His voice was soft and he looked broken.

"What do you mean? You live in the TARDIS."

"I meant outside of Martha's house." His voice broke as he mentioned her name.

"I tried to get her to come back; I went and talked to her." She looked at the floor, worried about his reaction.

He tipped her chin up so that she was looking at him. "Thank you but we both know it's over, she isn't going to come back."

"I tried so hard, I just wanted you to be happy. Again and I thought that if I could get her to come back then…" She trailed off and he smiled softly at her.

"I know and I'm sorry I've taken it out on you. I just miss her so much; she was such a big part of my life."

"I know, I'm sorry I pushed her away." Rose was being sincere, she wished that there was something she could do to make things right but like Martha had said, it was too late to go back.

"You didn't, it was my fault; I treated her like dirt and now I'm paying the price for it." He looked down at the floor then back up at Rose. "Listen, don't blame yourself, I don't blame you."

Rose smiled a small smile and thought to herself that maybe, just maybe, she could get him through this. He simply pulled her to him and hugged her.

The next night while the Doctor was laid in bed, a dark shadow crept through the halls of the TARDIS. The door to the Doctor's room was opened slowly and the shadow entered. The Doctor sat up abruptly and looked around the room, noticing the person in the corner of the room. "Who's there?" He asked, tired and not wanting to talk to anyone. "Rose?"

"Umm, sorry to bother you…" He recognised the voice instantly and sprang out of bed, rushing over to the figure and enveloping it in a hug.

"Martha, thank God; I have missed you so much." He held her tightly to him and sprinkled the top of her head with kisses.

"Don't suppose you need another passenger do you?" She wrapped her arms around his waist and held on for dear life.

"No…" He trailed off and she tensed in his arms. "I don't much want another passenger…I could use a friend though."

She smiled up at him and even though he couldn't see her face, he could tell by the way she held him that little bit tighter, that she would be around for a very long time because they both knew that they needed each other. For he is the Doctor and she is Martha Jones and when apart, they are two completely different people but together they are one and the same.

**A/N **Well what did you think? I was slightly sad to see Rose go but I think the Doctor is better suited to Martha. I wanted however to show that although he had moved on, he would always care about Rose. Please r&r…all welcome.

"I love you, not only for what you are, but for what I am when I am with you."

Roy Croft


End file.
